Why did the comedian keep telling jokes about chemistry?

To whoever stole my copy of Microsoft Office, I will find you.

Why was the grandma always getting A's on her papers?

What has a lot of ears but can't hear a word you say?

What kind of pie does a bird love to eat?

Why should you be worried about the calendar?

What did the father tomato say to the baby tomato while on a family walk?

What do you call a flower that runs on electricity?

Good moms let you lick the beaters.

What has 12 legs, six eyes, three tails and can't see?

Where did the hockey player get all his money?

Why do track athletes never give up on anything?

How do basketball players eat Oreo® cookies?

What does the Nutcracker say to his wife every night before bed?

What dinosaur would win the track gold medal at the Olympics®?