What kind of Valentine's Day candy is never on time?

Why do brass bands always bring a cornucopia to Thanksgiving?

What do you call George Washington's false teeth?

What sport is full of interior designers?

What do you get if you cross a computer and a Rottweiler?

What's chips and guac's favorite constellation?

Which vegetable is actually bad for you?

What did baby Godzilla call his mother?

What did you learn in school today, son?

What did the tree say to its long-distance girlfriend?

Why are pilots always in a good mood?

Why does bread have a hard time waking up in the morning?

Where do dogs go when they need emergency medical care?

Why do the Moon and the Earth get along best during the summer?

What kind of crop do lazy boys farm?