Why don't dogs ever finish their homework?

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple?

What type of birds stay together forever?

Why was the alien always crashing his ships?

What kind of Valentine's Day candy is never on time?

What's a bug's favorite Frank Sinatra song?

Why did the vampires cancel their baseball game?

What did the Australian chess player say to his waiter when he was done eating?

My brother is my partner in crime.

Why do people paint eggs for Easter?

Why did the baby cookie cry?

What musical instrument is found in the bathroom?

What did one tectonic plate say when he bumped into the other?

Why did the lawn mower get kicked off the team?

What's a direction's favorite holiday?